WHAT TO DO WHEN OFFENDED?

WHAT TO DO WHEN OFFENDED?

Pastor Lem Niere

 

“Then said he unto the disciples, it is impossible but that offences will come…” Luke 17:1.

 

Every so often, everyone has an opportunity to get offended. In fact, Jesus said, “….It is impossible but that offences will come…” The word “impossible” in Greek is "anendektos", meaning something that is inadmissible, unthinkable. One Bible scholar notes that it could be translated, “It is simply unthinkable that you would allow yourself to dream that you could live this life without an opportunity to become offended…”

What is an offense? This is the Greek word skandalon, from which we get the word scandal. This is a powerful picture that you must understand. The word originally described the small piece of wood that was used to keep the animal trap propped open. A piece of food was placed inside the trap to lure the animal inside. When the animal entered the trap and accidentally bumped the skandalon, and the small piece of wood collapsed, causing the trap door to slam shut with the animal inside with no way to escape.

In our text, Jesus used the word skandalon to warn us about events that happen in life with the potential to trip us up. Sometimes Satan baits us with something—drawing us into a trap in which he knows we’ll become offended. When we bump into a moment of offence, the trap slams down shut—and like an animal that is trapped in a cage and can’t get out, we suddenly find ourselves caught in a miserable situation, trapped in detrimental and negative emotions!

This means Luke 17:1 can be translated: “It is simply unthinkable that you would allow yourself to dream that you could live this life without an opportunity to be lured into a situation that could potentially snare you in the feelings of offense…” If this is really what Jesus meant, we need to know the nature of the bait Satan uses to get to us. What is the “offense” the devil uses to trap most people?

An offense usually occurs when you see, hear, or experience a behavior that is so different from what you expected that it causes you to falter, and wobble in your soul. In fact, you are so stunned by what you have observed or by a failed expectation that you lose your footing emotionally. Before you know it, you are dumbfounded about something. Then your shock turns into disbelief; your disbelief into disappointment; and your disappointment into offense.

We all experienced this kind of disappointment at some point in our lives. As long as we live and breathe, we must combat this nuisance and refuse to allow it to have a place in our hearts and minds. Even worse, we’ve all been the source of offense at some point or another. It may not have been intentional. In fact, we may not have even known we offended anyone until the person later came and informed us of what we did!

We can be almost 99-percent sure that someone along the way will misunderstand what we do or misinterpret something we say. Therefore, as Christians, we must:

1) do everything in our power to communicate correct messages to one another; and
2) do everything in our power to bring healing and restoration whenever misunderstanding and offense occurs between ourselves and someone else.

If you discover that you have been a source of offence to someone, take the mature path and go ask the person to forgive. And don’t get defensive, for that will only make the problem worse. It may even lead to a deeper conflict, so just say you are sorry and move on!

Do everything you can to bury that offense and destroy what the devil is trying to do between you. Make it your personal aim to help that other person overcome what he or she thinks you did or said.

Sometimes it is more important to help the other person attain a position of peace than it is to prove who is right or wrong!